Earthing ~ Intermission

Earthing ~ A Journey 8

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My Personal Journey to connect with Earth (continued)

I shall interrupt my historical journey for a moment, to bring a current Earthing experience…

I am in Thailand on an island. Koh Samet is a National Park, so doesn’t experience agriculture, or the pesticides and chemicals that go with it. Plastic detritus in the sea is a big problem, but nature still thrives here with a population of endangered Hornbill’s, lizards, snakes, scorpions, and a variety of life that is going missing in other parts of Thailand.

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The island is a playground for the rich and the poor. Everyone here is happy, even those who work selling stuff.

We have spent some long days walking barefoot here. The beaches are fantastic places for Grounding. The spirit renews and the soul soars when we can connect with nature and electrically bond with the earth. I watch and see the energy auras of people. They become flushed with white light rather than the muddy yellows and oranges associated with emotional problems and stresses.

Smiles and relaxed faces all around. Fun instead of work. Community spirit instead of reluctant interactions. Even the stray dogs are happy here, running into the sea, playing and really enjoying life.

I would recommend the beach as the best place to go barefoot and wash away the overcharged and over stressed burdens of modern life.

Kids instinctively know what to do at the beach. They run into the water and sit in it… Even toddlers will do this on their first ever visit to the seashore. We all need to do this, to reconnect with that which makes us healthy, happy, human beings.

Grounding is one of the easiest things to do, yet most of our life is ungrounded, self-inflicted detachment from our earth, and it makes us sick.  As I mentioned at the beginning of this series, the ‘Earthing Movie’ offers the science and the anecdotal evidence for the healing we experience from connecting directly with the earth and the reasons that we are mostly separated from it. Do Watch it…

The Earthing Movie

(To be continued…)

 

 

Earthing ~ Failures

Earthing ~ A Journey 7

My Personal Journey to connect with Earth (continued)

Time flies when you are having fun, or more correctly, when you are working towards a goal. Summer went by in a blur! We didn’t have a long summer break from college, and we’re now well into fall. One of the other students asked me if I would conduct a Reiki session for her Mom.

Mom was not much older than me. She was suffering terrible back pain and had consented to having a steel rod bracing surgically inserted to support her spine. It hadn’t gone well and now she was in hospital fighting infection and in agony. She was to have more major surgery to remove the rods again.

The student told me that she didn’t believe in Reiki, but would I try anyway? I wasn’t feeling optimistic about this, which should have been a warning for me to follow my intuition and keep away from this, but the student begged me.

We arrived at the hospital and were talking with her Mom when the private room door opened. A parade of interns and the surgeon walked in. My heart sank. Mom introduced her daughter, and then me, as lady who was going to give her some energy healing. The surgeon surveyed me skeptically. He spent a few minutes asking Mom questions and giving her info about her surgery scheduled for the next day, while we tried not to listen. As he turned to leave with his entourage, he smirked at me… “good luck, Maybe you’ll have better success than me!” It wasn’t meant kindly.

I took off my coat, and gloves, and washed my hands in the corner sink, but my hands were still chilly. I apologised for their initial coolness as I placed them on her. I moved systematically as I had been taught, focusing on general soothing energy generation. My hands began to generate their usual tingliness as I breathed energy through me. All touch, would have to be in face up position, as she had much difficulty in moving at all. As my hands moved over her abdomen (and of course, low spine beneath), strong magnetic fields started to jerk my hands to specific places. I had felt these before on other people. They were indicative of joint pain, wear and tear and inflammation. But these were the strongest magnetic sensations I’d ever felt. My hands danced as if possessed. They pulled to a specific spot. But from there I became scared…

I felt strongly that a sort of goo was attaching to my hands. I tried to pull it, but then Mom (who had been lying quietly up to now) began to moan and wince with pain. Her eyes were still closed, but her body heaved under my hands ever so slightly.

I was out of my depth on this Reiki session. Mom needed a ‘Master’ to work on her (as I had seen at the Saturday course). I felt unprepared to deal with someone going into the kind of thrashing that I had witnessed when trying to pull out this sick energy from a person. I had to let it slide back, and moved on. I finished the Reiki with soothing energy and gently asked Mom to open her eyes. She was asleep, but came around when her daughter said, “you can wake up now.”

Mom said she felt calm and it was nice, thanking me for helping. I didn’t say anything; I felt a complete failure. We left, and I decided not to tell the student what I had experienced. I had encountered something very bad… Bone cancer perhaps, but I really didn’t know and didn’t want to cause a false alarm. Later the student told me that her Mom still didn’t believe, but that she did note how my hands went from feeling ice cold to almost roasting with heat, especially over her abdomen.

I have only had one other intense instance like this. It came later when I had my massage therapy practice some years later. An elderly gentleman of African origin had walked in one day. He asked for a 30 minute session. I always did a thorough intake questionnaire and discovered some unsettling things on his medical history. I asked him to lie on my table (an adjustable hydrolic table that I could lower for him). I had not asked him to undress as per usual. I used palpation skills and a few easy tests to determine where his pain originated. My heart sank as I felt sticky energy in his right hip, pelvis and low-back. The poor man was in intense pain. Suddenly, the door had flown open and his large, angry looking wife stomped into the room yelling. She was unhappy he was on my table. I asked her to return to the waiting room, and that I could not divulge anything (client confidentiality). I turned to him.

“You need to go back to your doctor.Your problem looks quite serious and you may need to see a specialist.” I was as kind as I could be, and I apologised that I thought a massage would not help. He squeezed my hand and smiled. The man had suffered lymph cancer, but had been in remission for two years. What I intuitively felt, but could not say, was that I suspected that it had returned aggressively and was eating through his bones. I did not charge him, saying that all we had done was an assessment. He thanked me and left. I felt unhappy that I had to turn him away, but I would have been negligent if I tried to give him a massage. A Reiki session might have soothed, but that was not what he wanted or what my practice offered.

Five days later, the receptionist had a message waiting for me as I arrived for afternoon appointments. The man’s son had called to say that his father had died, but the family was very grateful to me. He had felt quite at peace after he left my office. I felt so unhappy. He was such a nice man.

Mom had all her steel rods removed, but still struggled with pain. The student and I were not speaking that often, so other than knowing something of her Mom’s gradual deterioration, I did not learn what the outcome was.

Sometimes, we feel things that we would rather not. Life throws all sorts of tragedies at us. Grounding is the only way to transmute the energies of such encounters. We cannot take on other people’s energies to ourselves, no matter how much we want to help. They just make us sick ourselves. I was not in a position to offer more, though I would dearly have liked to. I knew that I must not let my own ego get in the way. All I could do was learn from my failures.

(To be continued…)

Earthing ~ Experiences

Earthing ~ A Journey 6

My Personal Journey to connect with Earth (continued)

The post Christmas Season was a blah time. I wasn’t eating very well (again) and tended to stop at McDonald’s for an Egg Mcmuffin for breakfast on the way to college. Little did I know, until years later, that they (because of the egg) were the cause of ankle pains and joint stiffness that had me wearing orthotic inserts and taking pain killers. I thought it was the gruelling schedule and the physical demands of the massage practices that were having a physical effect.

It was the second term of school, and the pace stepped up, adding extra time to the curriculum in the form of evening massage clinics for the general public. This meant that I had to take one evening per week off from work. That meant catch up on my work load there too. My boss was not impressed, but I converted holiday allowance time to cover the evenings. I wasn’t going to get away with that forever though…My holidays would quickly run out.

My time at home on weekdays was now mainly just for studying and sleeping. As a consequence, my already crappy relationship, dived into a deep dark hole. I actually hated going home to a silent, brooding partner who was becoming more distant by the day.

One Saturday, his daughter was over. She often came on a weekend to visit her Dad. She was working now and would soon get her own apartment. We got on pretty well, but she was increasingly aware of the tensions and kept to herself beyond shared mealtimes.

I had just gone upstairs to put laundry away when I heard the phone ring. She answered it. There was a lot of talking, so the call was for her, but I couldn’t hear the conversation. However, I felt an awful feeling of dread come over me. There was something about the call that felt wrong and sinister. I had to do something.

Walking in to his computer room, I said to my partner, “I feel something bad is going to happen, please tell your daughter not to go out tonight.” He looked at me as though I’d grown two heads. “Uh huh!” he said shaking his head and returning his attention to his computer.

I had to do something so I ran downstairs and said to her, as soon as she had hung up, “I don’t know who that was, or what your call was about, and you don’t need to tell me, but I have a terrible feeling that something bad will happen if you go out tonight. I am begging you not to go out. Any other night, sure, but not tonight!” She looked at me and said simply, ” OK. ”

She went up to her bedroom. She didn’t go out, and that was very comforting, but I didn’t know the story until months later, when she chose to tell me.

She had been going out with a boy, that I had met only once, for almost a year. He had hearing problems (almost completely deaf) and possibly a few mental problems as well, I thought in hindsight. Their relationship had been good, but mixed with volatile arguments sometimes. It had not been violent until one evening he had punched her in the face. She ended the relationship then and there. He had begged her to come back. She didn’t.

He, apparently, had gone into a meltdown and his friends all blamed her. The phonecall had been from a girlfriend of one of his mates, with an invitation to a big get-together, but her ex wouldn’t be there, and would she come?

It turned out that she learned from the same girl, in a another phonecall some days afterward, that the get-together was so that all the mates could beat my partner’s daughter up to teach her a lesson. The girl had called to apologise, that she didn’ t know about the planned beating and was glad that she had not shown up.

I was flabbergasted. I knew my feeling of danger was profound, but this was just unbelievable.

Relationships are so complicated and often have hidden agendas. I was relieved when she said, “when you told me not to go out, it sort of confirmed my own gut feeling that something was wrong. I completely severed ties with that group.”

Life chivied along with lots of term exams, innane work stuff and little time to think, let alone ground and meditate. I saw my friends when I could which was at least once per month, but never enough. Finally, the Easter break came. While work would continue, I had my weekday mornings free for a while. I replenished my energy.

My Polish friend had thoughtfully invited me to join her on a Saturday workshop with a Reiki Master healer. It required that participants had already completed Reiki I and Reiki II courses, which I had, but I didn’t know if I would be welcomed last minute, without pre-registration.

The session held about 10 participants, I was the 11th, but welcomed anyway, and I paid the course fee in cash on arrival.

The Instructor and her Assistant talked about their backgrounds, and how they worked together. Their form of Reiki had developed into an advanced form.

Each participant would have a turn for a healing session with her but first, she would demonstrate a healing session on a volunteer. The lady waiting in the wings (a client of the Instructor’s) had just been diagnosed with cancer, a form of Leukemia (although we weren’t told this until afterwards), and had consented to this public healing session.

To say that my jaw hit the floor, would be an understatement. The healing session started out with a scan and the usual Reiki format, but then developed into something resembling psychic surgery. The pair of healers worked in silence, quickly and with focused determination. The Instructor would seem to pull something like a stretchy glue away from the clients body, and the assistant would cut it near the skin surface with her hands. This would always have a sort of snap on the Instructor’s hands as she pulled whatever, free and cast it to the floor. What was unbelievable, is that the client had her eyes closed, almost under a complete trance, but her body writhed in a fashion that one would think physically impossible. It was scary to watch, like something out of the exorcist movie, but not quite so malevolent. Occasionally, a moan would come from the client, her facial expression clearly indicating something weird happening.

The two of them pulled what seemed like reams of material/energy out of her body, and then closed off with a soothing  scan and the usual crossed-hands ‘T’ over the heart to end the energy connection in a gentle manner. The room was so quiet. The client didn’t move, but I could clearly see that she was deeply unconcious. I could barely see her breathing, and she was shivering. The Instructor looked concerned. She waved all of us to leave our chairs to surround the client with our hands placed carefully, one at a time on her body. We all took our positions. The client was stone cold, freezing. As we pushed energy into her with controlled breathing techniques, the Instructor piled on about 6 blankets. It took probably 30 minutes of warming her with our energy, but she did warm up and the shivering stopped. Not a word was spoken except for the whispered commands from the Instructor.

I began to feel a migraine start. I tried to ground and shrug it off, but the feeling of nausea was overwhelming. I said nothing. The Instructor looked up from her position at the clients head. She gently took the hands of the person next to her and put them where her own two had been. She approached me and grasped my own hands, gently pulling me away and indicated to other participants to close up the gap. She sat me on a chair a few feet away, pushed some energy into my feet, and gently whispered to me to drink some water. Then she returned to her position with her client.

Eventually, everyone was ushered back to their chairs, and we all took a break for lunch while the client slept on, gently snoring. It was just an astounding thing. No one spoke much. It was all pretty hard to take in.

The client eventually did wake, feeling groggy. She remembered nothing of what had just happened. The Instructor asked her if she felt able to stand up? She did, and they gave her some water. She said that she felt somehow lighter. She came and sat with us for a little while, recovering. She said that she would fight her cancer and she hoped the healing session had helped. She felt it had!

After lunch, and the client already gone, the Instructor explained that she had intended to do an instructional healing, that it wasn’t really meant to have turned into the serious and difficult healing session that we had just witnessed, but that she and her Assistant had encountered a dark, black, sticky energy full of magnetism. They had worked quickly to pull it out of the body, and there was no time to explain what they were doing. She apologised if it had scared us. They had been unaware of her cancer diagnosis until just minutes before the session. They explained that cancer has its own energy and is always difficult to deal with.

The rest of the day was for each individual to receive a ‘healing session’ of their own with the Instructor. Unfortunately, there was not enough time for me, but during the lunch break, the Assistant had been asked by the Instructor to give me a special Reiki attunement. It was lovely, and as good as any healing session that I have experienced. Unfortunately, my friend was a little peeved that I should have this ‘attunement’ when no one else was offered the opportunity.

I really think the attunement was to help me stop retaining so much energy when it entered my body. I was being grounded yet again by someone else.

I would have loved to do a course with this lady, but I was already stretched for time, didn’t have the money, and the course would be two hours drive away from where I lived. I was disappointed…

(To be continued…)

 

Earthing ~ False Bearers and Gifts

Earthing ~ A Journey 5

My Personal Journey to connect with Earth (continued)

Christmas was around the corner and my boss came up with a ludicrous plan. I was to contact all our own suppliers, but she also gave me a list of outside businesses, to ask for promotional items. I was required to market the idea as beneficial to each business as a method to gain University clientele.’ I was horrified. In reality, she wanted the items for staff prizes at our departmental Christmas party. It was her effort to be seen as the ‘benevolent boss!’

She rejected my draft letter to our contacts as it did indicate the true delivery point for the sponsored items. She made me rewrite it (suggesting it was a promotion to the whole University community) and sign it. I was totally ashamed of the idea and outraged at the fact it would bear my name (her insistence as I was the Marketing Manager). It went out to 120 different businesses, some as unrelated to University interests as beauty salons, gift shops and clothing shops. This wasn’t marketing, it was grand deception.

Some of our supply company reps called me to find out what was going on. I’d known them for years. They also knew how demanding the new boss was. I had heard her scream at a few of them behind her closed door. I apologised saying it was out of my hands. They all sent in promotional items like clocks, umbrellas, golf shirts, calculators, and other quality goods. My office began to look like a collection depot for a charity. I wished it were for a good cause but it wasn’t. I was sick about it. This went against every fibre of my being. Some of the other Managers also knew this was wrong too, but kept quiet, except for one, who thought it was my idea and shouted at me for my unprofessional conduct, which she thought was disgusting. She later apologised when she realised I had been ordered to send the letters out.

The night of the party loomed and my boss asked me why I hadn’t indicated my attendance. She looked Angry! “I have an exam next morning… I have to study, ” I answered (it was true). She looked disgusted. “You should have allegiance to your work here,” she countered. I pointed out that it was a voluntary social event, and that not everybody would go (but actually they did because they were scared of her wrath) . At the party, the staff had to play games to win the prizes… There were just so many items, most staff ended up with at least two of the sponsored gifts. None of the staff knew the true source of their prize (as promised in the letter) and thought that it was the best Christmas party ever. My boss was not going to forgive me for not attending. I was the only person missing.

I needed an antidote to the shenanigans.

Our Receptionist had gone to the party (because she didn’t want to incur the boss’s displeasure), but confided to me that she was pretty disgusted at the money spent on it. I asked her what she was doing for the holidays? “I’m cooking a Turkey, to take down to ‘The Food Kitchen,” she answered.

The Receptionist’s daughter worked for Amnesty International and also volunteered at the drop in centre for the homeless, known as ‘The Food Kitchen.’ All the volunteers were taking a cooked Turkey into the centre for A Christmas Eve Dinner Party for the street people. As her daughter was busy trying to get her baby well again, she was taking on the cooking of both Turkeys. “I can buy and cook one too, ” I volunteered.

Later, I also spoke with a friend working at a local’ Food Bank. ‘ She told me about a young Mum who had lost her job and just simply couldn’ t afford Christmas for her four-year-old.

So, on Christmas Eve, I gave my friend a food basket full of food, chocolates, a cooked ham, and a Christmas pudding, all topped by a giant Teddy and a few stocking stuffers to take to the young Mom. I never met her… I told my friend to keep it anonymous.

Then after cooking my stuffed Turkey, I bundled it into my car, still hot, and drove to the homeless drop in centre. My partner didn’t want any part of proceedings, describing it as a ‘complete waste of money.’ Bah Humbug.

There must have been 20 volunteers and at least 120 homeless people. I helped in the kitchen serving, and then we volunteers all sat down amongst the homeless to eat. It was a lovely party. One of the volunteers came in dressed as Santa and handed out homemade Christmas presents… Hats, scarves, gloves and items for survival on the street. Alcohol wasn’t allowed (for obvious reasons), but there was much laughter and lots of hugs. It was such a contrast to the work celebrations and actually my nicest Christmas Eve ever.

My own Christmas was pretty soulless but as always, I cooked a full Turkey dinner and all the trimmings. My ‘me’ time came later after I had finished washing-up. I would always ask my partner if he wanted to join me on an evening walk in the snow. The answer was always ‘no,’ and that year was no different.

The crisp air made the snow crunch underfoot. Tiny ice crystals were drifting in the air, looking like glitter in the glow radiated by street lamps. I could see my breath and felt it freeze on my scarf wrapped over my mouth. Christmas music wafted from houses lit up with neon pink, blue and green fairy lights. Occasionally a door would open and jolly voices would say hello or goodbye. But the magical bit always came with the stars. I could see Orion, the Plough, and the Pleiades group twinkling brightly above me as I moved to the darkened street end overlooking fields. There the universe spoke to me and always filled me with the best energy ever. It was and is the gift that keeps on giving. I felt I was changing and all that I once thought important, was just false and meaningless. It was as though a veil had been lifted and I was truly seeing the real face of real life for the first time. I was tempted to take off my boots and ground my feet, but it was just too darn cold! I counted my blessings and revelled in my great new experiences. The night felt magical.

(To be continued…)

Earthing ~ Transition

Earthing ~ A Journey 4

My Personal Journey to connect with Earth (continued)

 

I was scanning the Saturday Newspaper, when an advertisement hit my eye. A local Massage School was advertising its Fall classes starting in just two weeks. I knew that I wanted a job that helped other people, but it also had to be something that would also provide a viable income stream. This was a two-year accredited course that would provide me with a Registered Massage Therapist Qualification once I passed exams. I had thought about the healing arts during my ten-week hiatus, so the synchronicity of the ad shouted at me. The course was expensive for me, at $14,000 plus expenses, but my Dad had left me a little money… Just enough to cover the tuition fee, the text books and  supplies. But what would I do for an income for two years?

I told my partner about the school and said that it was something that I would like to do. He totally lost his temper at the mention of it, telling me it was a ludicrous idea and that we’d have nothing to live off. That decided me there and then. I am stubborn if not stupid. His lack of understanding about my work stresses really upset me, especially after all the years I had tolerated his financial whims. His pie in the sky attempts to figure out how the futures markets worked so he could make his fortune buying and selling coffee, pigs, or whatever it was, were all failures. Any money that he made was filtered through a Limited company and he never paid any income tax.  I never saw a dime. He didn’t like real work and I seemed to be doing everything. I was fed up, and disillusioned.

I called the registration number in the advert and left my details. I felt quite excited but also a bit nervous about the financial consequences. I had recently paid off our mortgage and my partner’s car loan, but we still had to eat, find money for fuel and pay for utilities.

Monday rolled around. I reported to my Boss’s office (she closed the door behind me). I played to her notions of power, grovelling as she’d expected, but explaining that I needed time to deal with emotional problems, full well knowing that University policy was to assist any employee experiencing health issues, either physical or mental. I caught her in her own trap really. As a long-serving employee with excellent yearly performance reviews, (at least until she took over after my former boss retired). I left her in an awkward position. I requested to go part-time and work flexible hours, basically a 3pm to 8pm shift for the most part so that I could sort out my problems.

She knew that she would have a hard time denying my request. I knew University employment policies as well as she did. She picked up the phone and called Human Resources requesting a meeting…

I won that round, and my part-time status became official, but I would later receive a terrible performance review completely based on her displeasure with me. She was slowly forcing me out.

My course began and would run from 8 am to 2 pm everyday with a lot of homework. It was going to be a gruelling schedule of school, work and late night study… My days would end at nearly midnight as I dedicated 2 to 3 hrs of reading my textbooks every night too! My head was filled with the kind of Anatomical information that first year medical students must learn, coupled with practical massage techniques. I found it almost impossible to write fast enough in the classes as I scribbled down course lectures.  I was the oldest attendee, but there were a couple of thirty-year olds too. The rest were fresh out of college.

Again, very quickly, despite all our different backgrounds, we bonded and the kids treated me really well. They really liked it when I showed them Reiki techniques and shared all my spiritual and grounding experiences. Despite the hard work, I loved going to class.

The teachers were all younger than me, but despite their initial misgivings about my ability to keep up the pace, they too, soon became my greatest cheerleaders.

Somehow, in the beginning, I kept up with it all, despite tiredness. But some things were not so easy. My Boss did make my life unbearable and she spread false rumours of my incompetence to other Managers. She even sent me on stupid missions to do menial tasks for my former employees. She wanted to rub my nose in it! Those employees had known me for a long time. They sympathised with me on my fall from grace and apologised for having to tell me what to do. Staff morale was at an all time low and no one wanted to raise their head above the parapet as my Boss’s wrath had descended on others too, including my old Night Manager, whom she finally lost patience with and ended his contract. Some people requested transfers to other departments on campus. Everyone had become just a little afraid of her. I tried to use the little influence that I had to make their lives better. I shared my healing modalities and grounding techniques with some of them too.

One day, I arrived at work to find our ‘tough cookie,’ receptionist in tears. I asked her what was wrong (already knowing that her six-month old grandson had been rushed into Toronto Sick Kids hospital). “He’s dying!” She sobbed. I went and put my arms around her, and she wept buckets. Fortunately my Boss was out for the day otherwise I doubt she would have found an outlet for her grief. As she calmed down and dried her tears with a tissue, she went on to explain that the hospital couldn’t stabilise him and they were going to do a Lumbar Puncture… Her voice trailed off as one of the men from the production area walked into the reception overhearing our conversation. “Wow those things are really painful,” he said unsympathetically. She started to cry again.

I took both of her hands in mine and looked her in the eyes as I said really slowly, “You can’t give up on him, he needs you and all your family to pray for him.” I am not religious, but I knew that this was the only thing she would understand. I continued, with conviction, “you all need to fight with him to beat this.” She managed a weak smile. She knew of my healing courses, so she wanted to believe me when I said that I would conduct a distance healing and would fight with her. I finished with, “He’s not going to die, we will all fight for him and see him as getting better.” She smiled and said “thank you.”

I walked out with the production guy following me, muttering loudly. “That was pretty irresponsible, telling her that her grandson won’t die,” he said, pulling up alongside me. “Especially when the doctors think he will.” I looked at him briefly and said, “he won’t!” And I walked away to my office.

I was focused as I quietly closed and locked my door. I had a drink of water, and sat, taking off my shoes. I grounded myself and went into quiet meditation for a couple of minutes. Then I lit a candle and began a distance healing focus. My mind travelled. I had never been to Toronto Sick Children’s hospital, but I visualised it anyway. I found myself in a brightly coloured ground floor corridor with a primary-coloured mural splashed on one wall. I followed it and came to a railing and a slight incline into a small semi private ward. I found the baby. He looked so frail with tubes and an oxygen mask on him. I sent him healing for an hour and grounded him in my minds-eye, but I also had a rather weird experience of a vision of Archangel Raphael. It was hovering over the cot.

I came out of the healing meditation slowly, feeling somewhat dazed. I drank a bottle of water and sat for a moment digesting what had just happened. I needed to go talk to the Receptionist before she left for the day. I didn’t care that I had just used up an hour of working.

I explained what had happened during my remote viewing experience. Her eyes brightened as she confirmed that her Grandson was on the ground floor of the hospital, in a room off a brightly painted wall in the corridor. I said “You and your daughter need to call on Archangel Raphael. He is the Angel of Healing. I just had to say it. I felt it mattered. She thanked me and went home to tell her daughter.

The next day, the Receptionist was waiting with a progress report.” He’s got Necrotizing fasciitis (flesh eating bacterial infection) they didn’t do the Lumbar Puncture!” She told me that he was in very serious condition but that now they have a chance if they can stop the ‘flesh eating’ with antibiotics. He had stabilised overnight. I smiled at her. “Keep praying, and be strong for him, he will fight.” She smiled back at me. She told me that her daughter had bought a poster of Archangel Raphael and taken it into the hospital to place on the wall above the cot. They were all pulling for him.

Two days on, she told me that he was recovering. He had lost half of one lung, but they had killed the bacteria and he was strengthening. I never saw a happier grandma than the one who was now hugging me. I told her that the power of love and prayer from all her family had done it and given him the energy and strength to fight. A few days later, she handed me a card from her daughter. It had on it a picture of the Archangel Raphael. Inside, heartfelt words thanked me for helping to save their baby. It wasn’t me, it was the energy, that everyone sent.

I saw the little boy again a couple of years later, for real this time, when I visited his Grandma at home. He came over and smiled at me, touching my knee before bouncing across the room to look after his one year-old baby sister. He had such a feisty spirit! I told his Grandma, “He’s going to be a great teacher one day! ”

(to be continued…)

 

Earthing ~ Uprisings

Earthing ~ A Journey 3

My Personal Journey to connect with Earth (continued)

My workplace became a place of backstabbing. My subordinate Night Manager wanted my job and tried to undermine me at every turn. I found him (a married man with three young kids) having an affair with another employee (also married). The security police had rung to inform me that our alarm system was being turned off at 2:00 am on a series of nights and my Night Manager’s code had been entered. (basically they were using my office for clandestine bonking sessions). However, my boss actually believed that he should not be warned or dismissed. Instead she ‘promoted’ me to a new job I didn’t want, nor was I qualified to do, and gave one of her friend’s my job. My Boss gave me no choice. I knew that this was the first sign that things were going to change, and rapidly.

I juggled my spiritual journey with an increasingly more difficult physical one. My new job gave me a new office, more computer work and demanded official marketing presentations but took away resposibility for any employees. (My Boss blamed me for not controlling my Night Manager’s rampant gonads!). However, other manager’s cooperation was required, and since I had jumped their ranks by 2 grades on the pay scale (something that shouldn’t have happened), it created animosity and I could not rely on their help (and in fact, they went out of their way to thwart my work). I was a long term employee, and my boss (only a year in the job) was not experienced enough to know what she was doing, but she had a way of belittling everyone, including me, while she flouted the rules.

Worse, I was suddenly aware that a deja-vu aspect of my death dream was developing quickly in my new circumstances. Not long after my move, my Boss said that I would be required to travel to New Orleans to some technology event or other, and she and her Supervisor would be coming too. My blood ran cold. It was the exact location in my dream that I had dismissed as silly and extremely unlikely. I had just been given a Dell laptop (an expensive bit of kit for the presentations) and my death dream had showed me going through a presentation on a laptop in the hotel coffee shop, when I would suddenly experience a gripping left side pain and my coffee cup would fall out of my hand, with the obvious death by heart attack consequences.

I kind of went into a meltdown of fear, but said nothing. Coincidence maybe, but many other incidences of the dream scenes were occurring for real,  and I began to panic.

I spent more and more time trying to meditate and ground myself. My world felt like it was spinning out of control and I could only watch and observe it doing so.

The real reason my boss wanted to go with me to New Orleans was to get an all expenses paid trip. It would be a junket on the public purse as our business operated under ancillary services of a University. It was all wrong, and I knew it. The venue would not benefit us or the University! The Provost, (her boss) was going along with this grand deception. I had to think of something to get out of it, but I was worried about income so I couldn’t just quit. I had several months before the New Orleans Technology Conference, so I did have some breathing space.

I thought I needed some time to think about my life without the stress of work. I requested an unpaid leave of absence for 10 weeks. I was entitled under the rules of my long term employment, but I still had to have a reason. I used ‘relationship problems’ as an excuse. My boss actually agreed (to my surprise).

My partner was going to visit his aging parents for six weeks, (and, as I would later learn, to play around with an old girlfriend on the side). My relationship was definitely on the rocks anyway.

I spent my ten weeks with my new friends, pursuing weekend Reiki courses, shamanic rituals, sacred dancing and special workshops that took me to an even higher awareness of connectivity and taught me more healing skills. I almost went to the ‘witch’ lady’s full moon celebration, but when she said they would dance naked around the fire and then sit in a sauna all night to purge their physical bodies, I wasn’t sure, and didn’t go. Perhaps I should have. In hindsight, dancing barefoot might have been very grounding, and the sweat lodges (a kind of shamanic thing), were built over bare earth.

During my solitary days, I sat on the grass in my garden, planted vegetables amongst the flowers and had my arms wrapped around trees on long walks, some barefooted. I was in heaven. All my stresses were out of my life for the moment. It was a blissful and healthy time for me. I ate salads and prepared lovely food from local organic shops and didn’t drink any alcohol. I was really grounded and happy. It was the best summer of my entire life.

But, I had to return to work, and while I needed a new job, I also needed time to implement a course of action to get one, so I continued playing the game.

The New Orleans trip was still three months away and I made a premature risky move to try to avoid going. It was one that didn’t pay off. In fact it backfired spectacularly…

I did a little research on the Technology Conference in New Orleans (coincidently occurring at the same time as the February Mardi Gras festival) and found that we were only given a small insignificant slot. It was hardly worth paying the flights, hotel and food expenses for  three (or as it would turn out, four people) to attend for four days.

And I told my boss in no uncertain terms that “We’ d be wasting our time there, and tax-payer money.”

My boss looked at me with thunderous eyes, walked around her desk and slammed her office door shut, (a sign to the staff on the other side of it, that she was about to tear strips off me). The blast of anger I received could be heard up and down the building. Then she said she would send another Manager in place of me and told me to ‘get out!’

I walked back to my office with staff eyes following me, burning holes in my back. Ten minutes later, my office door opened and my Boss walked in. Her anger, it seemed, had worsened. She was clever, no one heard this conversation and I couldn’t prove it (I did try, and even consulted a lawyer), but she growled in a low voice  that I was to go home immediately (it was a Friday morning). I was to think very hard about my options over the weekend and either come back on Monday with my resignation on her desk, or to grovel for my job (her words) but in that case, she would make my life a living hell for the rest of my work days.

I had not expected this at all. The stress for me was huge…

I had to  figure out what to do on Monday? … And I didn’t intend to go home to tell my lazy partner that I had virtually been fired. I spent the rest of the day in a nearby woodland trying to connect with the earth… And to plan a new life! I meditated and grounded myself all weekend. I was so grateful that I had this in my life, because without it, I think I would have had a complete mental breakdown.

(Incidentally, two of my previous staff were assigned to give the New Orleans  presentation in my place but when they all arrived that following February, the they had been relegated to 30 minutes in a general interest booth, outside of the conference proceedings – along with the trinket sellers – and they did their presentation to ten bored attendees, with five of them wandering away after just a few minutes. My Boss had not even made an appearance. The four of them spent the rest of their time partying day and night at the Mardi Gras courtesy of the Canadian taxpayer).

(To be continued… )

Earthing ~ Energy Lessons

Earthing ~ A Journey 2

 

My Personal Journey to connect with Earth (continued)

My work colleague never went to the meeting she had invited me to. She said that she hadn’t really got time, but she thought it might help me focus on something other than work for a change. She was right. I needed a distraction.

The Spiritual Natural Healing Course was being held in a city a few miles away. I wasn’t actually familiar with the address. Nor did I have a map. I should have phoned the instructor  before leaving work, as I realised I had no idea how to find her house as soon as I reached the outskirts of the city. I did not have the luxury of a mobile cell phone. Three intuitive turns later, I was there. I thought that the synchronicity of that journey was rather spooky, and I felt uncomfortable. How had I found my way there? I wasn’t sure.

There were 10 of us, but only two were men and retired, while the rest of us were working women.

I almost bottled out completely, when one participant introduced herself as a witch, especially as a nearby door violently slammed open, as she introduced herself. It all felt a bit creepy.

I began to think that I had made a huge mistake and was sitting with a bunch of nutty people. The skeptic inside me wanted to run away. Quickly! But then the instructor was asking about boring old me, with a job that suddenly sounded flat, non-productive and materialistic. I felt ashamed that I had nothing much to say about myself while everyone else seemed to have interesting, colourful lives.

Another, very relaxed lady, from Eastern Europe, sat cross legged beside my own uncomfortable form. She was a university chemist, working on research into natural antifreeze found in Arctic fish, for use in ice cream to stop ice crystals forming whilst stored in the freezer for weeks. The idea was that the research would have greater implications for other frozen materials, preserving their long term viability. Her English was impeccably precise, and  I later learned that she could speak five languages quite fluently. She followed the readings of Edgar Casey and was a member of a sacred dancing group. I was impressed, but somehow, the judgemental  me found her geeky. I shook away the thought as unkind and unfair. Maybe I was just tired (or jealous)?

A Polish participant introduced herself as a Reflexologist and Therapeutic Touch Practitioner. Her Aunt had taught her as a child to read tea leaves, tarot cards and to use herbal remedies. She later asked me why I always wore black clothes? “It’s such an insulating colour, it hides your light.” She touched my hand and smiled, “And you have such beautiful strong energy, but you need to ground and to let it shine!” Again, someone mentioned seeing my disconnected, and insulated energy. And I suddenly felt inadequate and critical compared to these sincere people.

These unique women later became my lasting friends, and I am forever grateful to them, because they pulled me through some very difficult times.

The instructor too would be something of a mentor to me when it came to my failing relationship. But I am getting ahead of myself…

We always began each class session with shoes off, sitting on the floor, feet and hands touching the floor. We had to focus on an image of energy flowing through the top of our head, through our body and down into the floor and beyond into the ground, and meditate for a few minutes, emptying our mind and just concentrating on the energy flow and transmuting our energy and healing ourselves. I actually found it a very soothing exercise, and could feel the day’s stress melt away, leaving me quite content. I think that I enjoyed it more than the actual healing practices.

Our literature was a thick set of notes written by the instructor, and  the book, ‘Hands of Healing,’ by Barbara Ann Brennan published in 1987. We most definitely had to feel grounded before we even tried to attempt sending healing energy to another person in the group. It was necessary to have a full focus.

What I found, over the numerous sessions, was rather extraordinary. As I focused energy into the ground, it seemed to change my perception of the people around me too. I felt connected to them despite all our different backgrounds, I felt an unexplainable allegiance, caring and even love towards them (even the not so scary Witch). It was as though all the labels that we had given ourselves at the start, no longer mattered. We were beings, and connected ones at that. A more supportive, caring group of people, you could not imagine.

We held free public ‘healing sessions’ at a local library for interested people, and couldn’t believe the number of people who came to have themselves grounded and receive energy from us mere novices. Everyone seemed to have an open mind, although uncontrolled pain and inflammation did tend to prompt ‘trying anything’ for relief, especially as the sessions were free. A woman with whom I spent quite a bit of time, was completely over-awed by it all. She confided that she had waited (missing her turn twice) to see me, specifically because she saw a lovely white light around me, and that she felt great. She invited me to her local church… Would I please go and offer healing to people there? I went one Sunday and had about 10 people lining up. I was exhausted later. I wasn’t really sure if I was helping, but I was certainly feeling a lot! And with every interaction I had, my own health seemed to be improving leaps and bounds  too. Was this all placebo effect? I wasn’t sure, but when people share caring energy, something magical happens to them.

I changed my clothing, bought brighter colours, and actually found myself not wanting to wear black, even at work. It was more of a gradual thing rather than a forced effort. I am not really a big clothes shopper, but I actually grew to dislike my black clothing and bought a pink suit for work.

After about 5 weeks of great experiences, I left the class one night, to make the hour long drive home, feeling really spacey. I thought I was hallucinating as everything that my headlights hit, seemed to be vibrant and moving. I stopped the car with a large tree visible in the light. I stared at it with disbelief. I could feel its life moving through the trunk and branches. It was the same when I looked at the grass. And the ground beneath me too. It all felt like it was inside me. I had only had water at the class, and I wasn’t ill. I wasn’t drunk, yet I felt an almost psychedelic euphoria without knowing why. Suddenly, work, my relationship and life in general, looked unsatisfactory. I wanted out of the rat race. I wanted what the earth, trees and grass had – deep connection and real experiences!

I wanted a different life, and I wanted it right now. Tears flowed. I felt my heart lift with the realisation that it could be different if I really wanted it to be. I wanted to help other people rather than slog away in the business of marketing and selling things. Things! There is no happiness in things! How on earth was I going to change everything at age 42, with a mortgage, bills, responsibilities, and a partner who took my role as the ‘bread-winner’ for granted? I had no idea.

(To be continued…)

Earthing ~ Beginnings

Earthing ~ A Journey

My personal journey to connect with the earth.

 

I became interested in finding a ‘simpler life as far back as 1996. I was really struggling, especially at work and in personal relationships. I had pursued a higher paid job in Management to pay mounting bills. I was working 12 hrs a day to cope with workload, supporting a deadbeat partner who wouldn’t work, and eating a crap diet of fast food during weekdays and convenience supermarket foods and alcohol on weekends. The treadmill was unrelenting and I felt tired and unhappy.

I was living the exact opposite of what I wanted and thought that I would never break out of the trap that I had put myself in. My last parent had died earlier in the year, and I actually felt quite alone in the world. My partner suggested that I was having mental problems, so I went to the doctor. Her prognosis was that I was physically and emotionally stressed (not mentally ill) and to change my life. I didn’t and that was the year that I got pneumonia in the middle of summer. I had also had to have pre-cancerous cells lasered from my cervix, had urinary tract problems and had been tested for anemia because I was so lethargic. My health was deteriorating and I got infections regularly. Migraines came frequently and I would have to leave work to go lie down with bags of frozen peas around my head and a hot water bottle on my stomach. I was a mess really.

Then I had a dream. In it, I went through a series of work related events, then died of a heart attack in a strange hotel and after an afterlife journey of vignettes of my whole life, woke in a morgue on a cold slab… I also woke at that moment in real life, heart pounding, fear-dripping sweat pouring out of me. I took some deep breaths and tried to shake off the dream. It wouldn’t leave. While it didn’t describe my current situation at work,  an ominous prophetic message was in there… these things would start to happen in 5 years…

I dismissed my dream as silly, but I started to look at eating more healthily and got interested in organic foods and Permaculture. It didn’t last. I kept on pursuing work like a possessed person and gradually, it was all that I lived for, even though I didn’t enjoy it that much. I usually got sick the minute I had annual vacations, so those were never the panacea for my beleaguered spirit either.

One day in 1999, feeling particularly down and under work strain, I mentioned my feelings to a work colleague at lunch time. She said, you should come over to my complex tonight. The residents are having a talk on spiritual natural healing. It might be good for you. I reluctantly agreed to go.

I was late, because I was finishing up a work task that really could have waited, so I walked into a room full of quiet people already settled, and expectantly waiting. There was no sign of my work colleague and so I slunk into the only available seat  in the middle of the room. I was fidgety and irritable and not used to just sitting calmly. I really didn’t want to stay, but felt conspicuous.

The lecture was being given by a middle-aged woman (a Speech Language Pathologist by profession) and her assistant friend. They were fiddling with a slide projector near to me, which for some reason would not turn on. I remember my cutting remark. “Perhaps you should use some spiritual healing on it! ” Yes, I was a skeptic, but I immediately regretted my nastiness when the instructor turned and looked at me kindly, ignoring my outburst. “Welcome,” she said warmly, “perhaps I will,” and the projector leapt into life, making me feel like a complete shit!

The slide show was about Kirlian photography, and then we took part in a series of exercises to experience the energy that the body projects. We had a moment to meditate and ‘ground’ ourselves. I just sat quietly. I had no idea how to do either. We partnered up with the person seated next to us. I didn’t know the woman, but we had to do a body scan of each other with our hands. This was keeping the hands about an inch away from actually touching the person and done in slow sweeping motions from head to toe going completely around the person until reaching the starting point. I felt lots of things coming off my partner… cold points, hot points, magnetic points… It was all just fanciful, I thought. But as I talked to her about where some of those points were, my partner was incredulous. When we shared what we felt with the group, my partner blurted out, “she picked out every injury I had in my body!” The instructor smiled kindly at me again.

We went through some more energy experiments, including using divining rods made from metal coat hangers. Mine went crazy in my hands… crossing all over the place as I advanced toward other people, and sometimes swinging wildly. I couldn’t control them. Meanwhile, everyone else was struggling to feel them move at all. I saw the instructor watching me thoughtfully, but she said nothing.

Our last experiment was to have a try at sending healing energy to another person. I was paired with a man of Japanese origin. It went well until he sent healing to me. My head felt like it was going to explode. A massive migraine started. I struggled through and finally it was over. I sat on a chair feeling exhausted and in pain. People were leaving or chatting in little groups and I just felt like I was going under. I felt cold, almost like a sudden flu had taken over my physique. The instructor approached me…

“Oh you poor thing!” She looked at me with concern. Taking off her shoes (and requesting that I do the same), she sat in front of me and put her hands on both of my feet. She said, “YOU are completely ungrounded, and your energy has stopped moving down below your waistline… Exploding in your upper body and head.” I had not mentioned the migraine at all.

Her hands were hot, making me realise that my feet were freezing. She said nothing, but looked at my feet intensely as she sent the most incredibly comforting feeling into them as she pinned them to the tiled floor. I felt the energy in my head move and a downward flush of warmth through my entire body. It only lasted a few minutes before someone demanded the instructor’s attention. She admonished, “YOU need to go home and rest, and drink lots of water to rehydrate and rebalance. You need to learn how to ground too.” With that, she was gone. I felt so different, and in awe of this weird experience, that I wandered over to the sign up sheet for a course that she would be giving. I put my name and details on it, took the information sheet for the location and wrote out a cheque for the course fee. I had to know more…

(to be continued…)

Earthing ~ Primer

Earthing – A Journey

I have wanted to do a series of posts on ‘Earthing,’ for at least a couple of years now, but have had great difficulty in finding the right way to approach what I find to be a difficult, highly important concept, to portray in any sort of coherent manner. I will give credit to my good friend, raw god, for providing inspiration to approach the subject from a personal viewpoint, rather than preach in any way. It is excellent advice and actually makes it a much easier series of writings.

Before I begin with personal accounts, (which will be mixed with a little of what I have learned from other sources), I want to start in the middle of this subject. A strange place to start any account of one’s experiences, but important for any reader who might need some background on what ‘Earthing,’ or ‘Grounding’ (as it is alternatively known), means to human beings.

This documentary, released in December 2019, gives a very tangible account of why we need to connect properly with our Earth, in an electrical sense, for our own health and well-being. It is factual, has written scientific papers backing up its authenticity and is intended for a wide range of audiences. Since my partner watched this, he has been walking barefoot everywhere he is able (getting quite filthy in our pollution-filled world). I am more selective, as concrete and asphalt roads, and our man-made environments are full of insulating materials, blocking any sort of connection with the ‘earth’ beneath our feet. I hope you will watch this as it is one of the best scientific approaches that I have seen on this subject which is often shrouded in the spiritual and mystic practices of society.

I will continue this series with a very personal account of my own journey with ‘earthing,’ my on and off relationship with it, and where I want to take it going forward. My journey is unique, everyone will find something different, but I think by telling my story, just as in the documentary that you have just watched, I might just help you, my reader, with your own wellbeing journey. But more, perhaps it will also convey the urgent need for a connection with each other and all life on our planet.

Deep Connection

It is 2020, and I have not written for so long. The terrible fires in Canada the US and Australia and the dire prediction of Blue Ocean Events, Climate Chaos and Extinction events, and Political polarisation, world-wide, have thrown us (and me) into a fear state of epic proportion. I have not felt like writing about these events or the great sadness I feel for the loss of everything I hold dear to my being.

I have been thinking all day on how to connect, how all of us connect in this thing called life. Everything seems to be in dissonance and chaotic upheaval right now. I know chaos theory is a mathematical sub discipline studying complex systems of seemingly random patterns. But I also know that Golden Ratios and Fibonacci sequences are the opposite, being simplistic, harmonic mathematical patterns that are eloquent and easy to find in nature, indeed throughout the universe. They are the stuff of creation itself.

The Fibonacci sequence can be applied visually, and musically. There are some lovely, and fascinating Youtube representations you can find of this. It’s repeating pattern is soothing and somehow binds everthing together. So how do we leave the dissonance, and connect to the harmony of Fibonnacci sequences in our lives?

I think that this comes from wanting to ‘sing from the same hym sheet’ to quote a rather tired, but useful, euphemism. So why don’t we try… Why don’t we start sending our love to all situations as a global force to quiet the dissonance?

This video was made almost 10 years ago. Hundreds of people auditioned for the virtual choir, singing in front of their home computer to a virtual conductor (Eric Whitaker) . The result was compiled and its creation has been featured at many Ted conferences and othe venues.

When people focus on the same thing, put their heart and soul into it and let their light shine, all dissonance disappears. It is a simple idea and the beauty is astounding… Could we make the world beautiful again by blocking out all dissonance with focused and loving intentions?

The composition Lux Aurumque (“Light of Gold”) is a choral composition in one movement by Eric Whitacre. It is a Christmas piece based on a Latin poem of the same name. It is such an ethereal piece of music that it gives me hope for 2020. I keep watching it over and over, because it touches my heart.

No to Killing

No to Hunting! No to War!

A disclaimer. You may not like my point of view, but I need to share my belief that humans must stop killing.

I am upset… Yes, I am really upset. I feel sick inside and tearful because I have just witnessed the unnecessary death of an endangered Turtle Dove… An animal that we associate with ‘love.’ There was nothing loving about its death. It was shot, tried to fly away, but could not land in its chosen refuge of a willow tree. Instead, the injured bird cascaded down through the willow branches to hit the river below. It did its best to pull itself to shore, slid under the overhanging foliage and disappeared, most likely to die an agonising death. I stood on the opposite bank separated by water from the hapless creature and separated from hunters by an impenetrable bank and fencing. I, the sole witness to a life lost for no reason, am inconsolable.

My grief means nothing to the sport hunter. They don’t care about the lives they take. They operate in disguise as farmers protecting their crops or livestock from what they consider ‘vermin.’ How strange then, that they bring in groups of enthusiasts to help them. No, their hunting is not a protection of the farm… It is a bloodlust, a degraded form of entertainment that generates huge profits for those who provide the ‘organised shoots.’ Whether the perpetrators are on horseback, in a 4×4, or on foot, they all have a ‘kill’ mentality as their main objective. It happens not just in the UK, but everywhere. Gutless individuals dress themselves in fatigues, arm themselves with expensive high powered rifles and shotguns and hunt down the mostly tame wildlife that looks on innocently as the gun is pointed at them.

This is not hunting for food. Millions of pheasants and partridges are imported each year into Britain for the sole purpose of killing them. They are not taken home, dressed and hung, so a hungry family might eat. Their bodies are mostly discarded right after the shoot.

Those that turn guns on animals, have no problem turning a gun on a person. Their bloodlust doesn’t stop but is only held in check by laws that would see a person go to prison for shooting another person. The law does not protect animals. They are victimised in such horrible ways and the perpetrators are not punished.

I reported my sighting to the RSPB and to Wild Justice. They can’t do anything, I have no evidence… No photo, no video of any of it, but making people aware is first and foremost, available to us. To be silent about witnessing a ‘wrong,’ is to condone such things. I cannot and will not condone hunting, whether it is a struggling fish on the end of a line, or a canned hunt of lions raised to be killed for a trophy rug. I do not condone farmed animals either. Yes, they are for food (for some but not for me). Farm animal existence is one that is equally persecuted and justified as necessarily cruel, whether in the living conditions or at the ultimate death in the abattoir. That is really shirking responsibility to provide a good life for an animal that dies for us to eat.

Likewise, warmongering amongst humans is just as cruel. It gives the bloodthirsty a reason to kill with impunity. Our world is, and always has been, full of people who force us into wars unwillingly, and kill us if we resist.

We must change our attitudes, and include compassion for the other living beings around us. If we do not, and continue our bloodlust, then humanity has no purpose and we will go extinct. There is no reason for us to be on a biodiverse earth if we choose only to kill the other life upon it including our own species. We have no purpose on Earth as a ‘killer.’

Worrying

This is a guest post by gserpent.

I myself find this something for me to think about. I am the proverbial worrier… And as this post points out most eloquently, the things we worry about may never happen, or if we are so determined to worry, it can become a self-fulfilling prophesy (even if it is unconsciously provoked).

I encourage you to go to gserpent’s page to read…and follow the various reference links. However, many thanks to gserpent, for permission to reprint the text and video here for convenience. 

 We all worry.  Why do we worry all the time?  Getting this under control is one of the greatest things Magic does.  We as a human race are constantly looking for problems and danger. We look for something to happen.  No matter how good things get, we constantly play out worst case scenarios in our mind. Most people think this is a good thing.  They are simply wrong. It fills us with anxiety and we get addicted to the anxiety. You will never eliminate worrying, but you can understand that worrying is worthless.  

When you worry you don’t get good results in your life and it makes you not feel good.  It makes you feel frantic and anxious. It causes you to self sabotage. You focus on something and you actually attract it to you.  What you think about you bring about. I just got back from a vacation. We flew out to Phoenix and my mind wanted to get me to think about the bad things that could happen.  What if the flight has a mechanical delay? What if our rental car breaks down? What if our reservations were messed up at the resort? What if, what if, what if. If I focused on these worries, I would not have had a good time.  What most do is they focus on the bad that pops into their mind and it makes their motivation go way down.

 

The ancients called this the troll or gremlin in the mind. It is the troll or gremlin in your mind that is doing this.  People will worry so much and cause the thing to happen that they worry about and then they will say their worrying was justified.  When if fact they brought it upon themselves. The thing with worrying is that is spikes the emotion of anxiety and fear. When you set things in your mind with emotion it makes them stronger.  Your mind thinks that’s what you want so it brings it to you. Then your mind gets into a vicious loop.

 

First you need to understand that worrying is not your fault.  If you have read Lemurian Magic, you understand that chaos has been with the human race from the beginning.  Our race has had catastrophic things happen from the very beginning. It is why the human race is how it is.  When things get good we worry about bad things happening. When bad things don’t happen we make bad things happen because we are addicted to the feeling.   Our mind wants to bring bad things to the fore front. We live in a world of duality. Bad things will happen, but we as a human race keep thinking about bad things and actually bring on bad things because we are addicted to it.  It is just like a new born who’s mother was addicted to a drug while she was pregnant. That new born will be addicted to that drug and will probably seek that drug out their whole life. This is the human race! We were born addicted to the drug of chaos.  Our mind seeks it out! We are addicted to fear and anxiety and we want that drug.

 

Worrying is useless.  You will never eliminate them, but you can reduce the worrying or make them not as bad.  Worrying drains your energy. It drains you psychic energy and mental resources. When you focus on the worrying you start to worry more.  Your vibration starts to change and your mind brings in more negative worrying(see Are Your Thoughts Your Own?). When you start to worry, catch yourself and ask your mind, why are you doing this?  What is the purpose of this negative worrying? Let the ego side of you mind know that you are in charge now and you will focus on all the cool, fun, good things that will happen instead of the bad.  That is exactly what I do anytime I get caught into a worry spiral. This process can be rather amusing if you listen to yourself argue with your own ego. It is what Gollum in Lord of the Rings was based on.

 

The ego is the infantile side of the mind.  If you yell at yourself and talk down to yourself in your own head, it will just feed the tantrums and worrying that your ego will do in the future.  You need to be gentle with your own ego. Just like a child will not respond well to negative motivation, neither will your ego. Negative motivation will work, but it’s not high quality and will not last for long.  Besides why would you want to motivate yourself with pain when you can motivate yourself with ambitions, pleasure and desire. Become aware of yourself by monitoring your own thoughts. Be honest with yourself. If you are a constant worrier and all you do is think negative thoughts all the time,  make a catastrophe about situations, worry about stuff that is out of your control or if you worry about things and stuff does not work out for you then you need to admit to yourself that the infant ego is in control. This is valuable insight to have about yourself. With this you can bring awareness to your worrying.

 

Your thoughts create your feelings and emotions.  If you are anxious and low energy all the time then its your thoughts that’s doing it to you.  It creates frustration and negative feelings. Try to focus on the positive outcomes when you catch yourself worrying.  When I catch myself worrying about the negativity I will get with what I say on my blog, I switch that to focusing on all the people I will help by releasing info that is very hard to find.  I focus on the chains that I break others from. How breaking the chains made my life better and how it will help others who want to break the chains too. Even if you have done the rejecting thoughts and accepting thoughts exercise I show in Magic, this exercise on focusing on the positive outcomes will help you too.

 

This is the beginning of inner work and understanding yourself.  Im not telling you that all your fear is bad. There is such a thing as realistic fear.  You would not be alive without realistic fear, but worrying brings on unrealistic fear. So other people will tell you that you have to get rid of all your fear.  Realistic fear is necessary. It keeps you from doing stupid things that will get you hurt or killed. Unrealistic fear is when you experience fear or anxiety when there is no real threat.  It’s all in your head. It is all the ego doing it. I can not stress this enough, it’s not your fault. Our minds are addicted to anxiety because of our history. Here are three more things that will help you get the worrying under control.

 

Put yourself in new situations.  Experience the world. Learn things for yourself.  Part of the reason a lot of people worry is they live a sheltered life.  Remember back the first time you started something new like your job. You worried about every last little thing until you got used to doing it and it became routine.  All the unrealistic fears you had caused anxiety. When you get out and do new things your mind will worry, but do the exercise I just showed you. Then when you go do the new things you like again, there will be less anxiety and you will have learned new things.

Break the feedback loop of your mind.  Whatever your internal state is, your emotional state or your regular state, it will be how you perceive the world.  We all live in this world but perceive it different. It is our relativity. We will all tune in to things that keep that inner state alive.  When you start to get into a worry spiral, you will look for things to reinforce your worrying. Then you worry more and look for more reinforcement.  Break that loop. Make yourself focus on the positive outcomes. This is why I say cut out the news. All of the news is to keep you in a negative feedback loop.  Change your influences.

Re-own what you have disowned about yourself.  Think of a time in your life where you were made fun of or shamed for something you did that was outside the norm of the masses.  Maybe you had an outfit you loved and wore it to school and got made fun of, so you never wore it again and started wearing what everyone else was wearing.  Maybe you spoke up about something and were shamed by a teacher for not going with what’s in the text book. It may not sound like much, but to a kid it is traumatic and overwhelming.  As a kid, your world is all you knew. To not fit in literally feels like you will die to a kid. When you were shamed or ridiculed your survival instinct kicked in and disowned certain parts of yourself, so you could fit in.  You have lived your life that way ever since. When certain things come up in your life today that trigger you, it makes you feel like you did when you were a kid. Realistically being different is not dangerous, but our mind makes it out to be dangerous.  Re-own who you are and validate who you really are. Look for things that trigger you, the things make your mind start to worry and give you anxiety. Those are bithings you have disowned about yourself. People try to stay out of situations that trigger them, but if you let yourself be triggered it brings it out so you can bring awareness to it.

Apply all of this to your life and it will help slow the worrying down.  These are what helped me. No one knows you better than yourself. Magicians, Witches and Wizards use the subconscious side of the mind to help them think.  It is the part of the mind that has been around since the beginning. Using it will not eliminate worrying, but it will help bring the worrying ego under control.

Worrying – Go to Original blog

https://secretsoftheserpent.com/2019/07/10/worrying/

 I encourage my readers to go to the originating website for this post. This is a straight text copy-over, whilst the original has many links to sources that you might want to pursue. I have disabled comments here, so that you may comment directly on the originating blog site. 😊